Friendship

Friendship–noun

1.	the state of being a friend; association as friends: to value a person's friendship.

2.	a friendly relation or intimacy.

3.	friendly feeling or disposition.

Friendship is something that I value a lot. It is not everyday that you find someone that you can be true friends with. I don't have many true friends in my life. So when you find that friendship hold it close because you never know how long it will last. Cherish the precious moments in your life.

My Give a Damn Is Busted

So I was thinking about my life today and this song by Jo Dee Messina popped into my head. I hate when people don't return my phone calls or when people walk all over me and want to use me to get something and this song kind of says how I am feeling about it. I just don't care anymore. Forget you. I mean I shouldn't care if you don't want to take the time out of your busy schedule to have a true friendship but the problem is I do care but I am tired of caring because all it gets me is hurt feelings. I am tired of waiting and wishing things would turn out differently. I am tired of acting like I don't care when people walk all over me! It is time for me to take a stand and I think I am going too. So My Give a Damn Is Busted! I don't care what other people want me to do or if they ignore me. It is time for me to move on and focus on what is best for me for once in my life!

Jo Dee Messina
My Give a Damn Is Busted

Well, you filled up my head with so many lies.
You twisted my heart till somethin' snapped inside.
I'd like to give it one more try,
But my give-a-damn's busted.

You can crawl back home, say you were wrong;
Stand out in the yard and cry all night long.
Well, go ahead and water the lawn:
My give-a-damn's busted.

I really wanna care.
I wanna feel somethin'.
Let me dig a little deeper:.
No, sorry: nothin'.

You can say you've got issues, you can say you're a victim.
It's all your parents fault,I mean after all you didn't pick 'em.
Maybe somebody else has got time to listen:
My give-a-damn's busted.

Well, your therapist says it was all a mistake:
A product of the Prozac and your co-dependent ways.
So who's your enabler these days?
My give-a-damn's busted.

I really wanna care.
I wanna feel somethin'.
Let me dig a little deeper:.
No, still nothin'.

It's a desperate situation, no tellin' what you'll do.
If I don't forgive you, you say your life is through.
C'mon, gimme somethin' I can use:
My give-a-damn's busted.

Well, I really wanna care.
I wanna feel somethin'.
Let me dig a little deeper:
No, Man sorry.
Just nothin', you know.
You've really done it this time, ha, ha.
My give-a-damn's busted.

What is a church?

So on Wed I went to this new church. It was pretty much amazing. I walked in and went to help out with the kids. After a few minuets of coloring/playing with stamps we went into the sanctuary to let the kids watch a baptism. We were sitting in there singing and I just thought that it was amazing. Then while they were getting ready for the baptism they were doing announcements and there was this little kid running around. My first thought was why is this little kid running around? I mean it is a little distracting. Shouldn't someone make him be quite? He was like running around and being kind of loud. Then as I was sitting there the guy doing the announcements mentioned that the church was a family. I am not really sure what exactly he was talking about but I caught that and I thought duh. This is not what this church is about. No one cares if a kid is running around. They are all here to praise God and to worship him together as a family.

Then while they were doing the announcements they announced the VBS coming up next weekend. They said they needed some volunteers and like two or three people raised their hands and said that they would help. I just sat there and was like WOW that would never happen in my church. This is pretty amazing. It also reminded me of an episode of desperate housewives. Lynette asks Bree if she can go to her church but thoroughly embarrasses her by raising her hand and asking the pastor a series of questions after his sermon, in front of the whole congregation during church. The pastor later says that he really likes that Lynette asked a question during church. Bree is shocked at this. Now seeing this and seeing what happened during the announcements made me think why can't we ask questions during church? Why can't the church be more like a family? I just don't understand that. I think that in todays church it is more about image and being proper and this is what you do and if you something out of the normal than everyone will stare at you. I don't think that a church should be like that. I feel that the church should be a place where you are comfortable and you can say or do anything without feeling like you are an idiot. Shouldn't the church be like a family where we all love each other no matter what we do or where we come from? I feel like todays churches have lost site of that. I wish we could just all get back to that.

So this is what I thought on Wed night while I was sitting there. Then we went back in to the classroom after the baptism and we had our lesson. It was pretty fun. I got to know one of the girls pretty well. I think that I am really going to enjoy doing ministry over there.


Last summer I worked at a summer camp and to get the kids quite we would say...
GOD IS GOOD! then they said... ALL THE TIME!!
Then we said....
ALL THE TIME! then they said... GOD IS GOOD!!

MAN IS HE AWESOME OR WHAT??

Getting back to what I LOVE!

Have you ever set back and looked at your life and thought is this really happening to me? Well that is kind of how I feel right now. About 6 months ago I decided that I needed to take a break from ministry. I felt that I was doing too much. I mean I was just going to school, working and working with the church on both Wed night and Sunday morning plus some weekend trips. It took up most of my time so I thought I would take out something. Little did I know that it was not what I needed. Those few months were not fun at all. I missed being so involved with church. So I started working on my relationship with God during this time. I felt like I was always trying to find out what I needed and what I should do. I wasn't taking the time to listen to God and find out what he wanted for my life. So I am still in the process of working on that and I started hearing him say "inner-city" work is where you need to be. Inner-city work to me is everyday people who live in the run down parts of town. They are the people that I feel that we tend to forget about a lot of the time. I want to work with these people. I don't want to preach to them. I just want to get to know them and show them what a Christian is supposed to look like. I know from experience that a lot of people have a warped view of Christianity because they have had a bad experience with someone who said they were a Christian. I just want them to see Christ through me and through my actions. I have started to learn how to do this through neighborhood walkers.

Well I have been thinking about this whole inner-city idea for about 2 months now. I drive past this apartment complex that is a little run down and my parents would not want me to live there because the neighborhood isn't all that great but the thought has crossed my mind "I wonder how much rent would be." I had almost stopped several times but I just kept thinking I am in a lease until December. Then about 3 weeks ago I was having lunch with a friend and she got a phone call about a city wide apartment ministry meeting. She didn't know what that was but when she told me I told her my story about driving past the apartments and about my vision for where I want to do my ministry. She then told another one of our mutual friends and she e-mailed me the details of the meeting. I knew that it had to be what I call a God thing for all of this to just fall into place. It was pretty amazing. After I got the e-mail from my friend I e-mailed the guy in charge and he told me about the next meeting. I was super excited. I also asked him about getting involved with a church that is in town that is primarily neighborhood people. He told me that they are always needed help so I started helping there this week. I also went to the apartment ministry meeting and I think I am going to fall in love with this ministry.

I am super excited about all of this but at the same time I am scared to death. I don't know what to think. I am glad that God is putting all of this in front of me. I think that it is a great opportunity. I am going proceed and see what happens. When I told one of my friends about how I was feeling she told me that it was a good thing to be nervous because that means that God will have to help me through this and I will have to rely on him. That makes so much since. God doesn't call the equipped he equips the called. So my prayer today is for God to equip me with the knowledge that I need to do the ministry he is calling me to do.

life

So I have been informed that I haven't bloged in a long time! SO here you go!

Life has been busy. I am working on taking some summer school and my brother graduated this last weekend. It was nice to see the family but it was a looooong weekend. I am tired and Summer 1 classes started today. I am taking 6 hours during summer 1. It should be interesting. Well I don't know much but there is a little up date on what is going on in my life. I hope you all have a great day and I will catch ya later!